Thursday, August 20, 2009

The Squirrel's Nut Cache - 8/20/09

The Nut Cache - a collection of recent things I found interesting, or amusing, or nutworthy. (Note: This blog has not changed it's name to The Squirrel's Nut Cache! I will be posting other stuff soon. Really. I've just been busy, is all. Really.)

I can't tell you how many people sent me this story. The first was my sister-in-law, so she gets the hat tip, but thanks mucho much to the rest of you. And y'all weren't surprised to find out that squirrels like to be the center of attention, were you? Nah, I didn't think so!

Excepting once in a while, just around the house, when I might just possibly whistle at Mrs. Squirrel, I'm not in favor of men whistling at women. (Guy Tip - whistling at a woman on the street is really not a good way to meet them. Just saying.) Rude though it may be, the guy who does whistle really doesn't deserve to be assaulted. But, if you really feel that a physical confrontation is required (not an opinion I share!) at least make sure you beat up the right guy! Note: "All three women admitted to being drunk at the time of the incident." Yeah, I saw that coming, too.

I don't know how many times I've seen this in a movie or television show, but I never really believed it. It's just too cliche! But, maybe it's cliche because it actually works. It sure worked in this case! I guess bars on jail windows is a good idea, even when the windows are 50 feet up.

There's just a whole bunch of really bad "big drug bust" jokes here. I'm resisting making any. I really am. I'm trying really hard not to say anything about this story. Mrs. Squirrel has already slapped me in the back of the head for making jokes about this story, so I'm sure not going to type any. Make up your own joke, it's really easy... too easy.

Was he bold or just stupid? Only his psychologist knows for sure. One thing is for sure, he wasn't very smart. All criminals, repeat after me: "Do not rob the police station. Do not rob the police station. Do not rob the police station." Okay, everybody got that? Good.

If you work at a bank, and if the bank were to be robbed, it would be nice if the robber said that he was sorry on the way out, wouldn't it? I mean, that makes it all better, right? Well, maybe not; but at least all bank robbers are not rude and uncaring.

That's the Nut Cache for this week! Happy nuttiness!

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