Thursday, April 22, 2010

The Squirrel's Nut Cache - 4/22/2010


The Nut Cache - a collection of recent things I found interesting, or amusing, or nutworthy.

I grew up hearing that "One man's trash is another man's treasure." That's true even if you work at a landfill, I suppose. When a local beer distributer dropped of 1500 cases off beer that was past its "freshness date" at the local landfill, it seems that a couple of city employees decided to back up a truck and help themselves. They got the beer, but they also got caught on video. "City officials say they still don't know what happened to the beer." Um... I've got some ideas...

Here's a local Missoula story! The owner of a local bakery (really really good whole-grain sunflower seed nut bread -- Yum!) Made it on stage at The Price is Right, and did quite well, it seems. Here's the story (part 1 & 2) -- it's long, but a pretty good read. I haven't stopped by the bakery since I found out... have to do that sometime soon.

"It's not unusual" to steal a chicken when you a young & hungry musician. "It's not unusual" to be baned from the town where the chicken was stolen. "It's not unusual" for a starving young musician to become famous. And, I suppose, "it's not unusual" for the town to finally lift the ban on the now famous musician after 47 years!

It's not too much to ask, is it? I mean once, just once, I'd like to find a story for the Nut Cache about a smart criminal... Well, that day may come, but it is not today. "A burglary suspect came up with a creative explanation after he was found dangling from the ventilation system of a Maryland convenience store. He told police he was playing hide-and-seek." Creative? I don't think so!

One good thing about stupid criminals, they sure are easy to catch. They always do stupid things to draw attention to themselves. Thinks like, I don't know... shouted obscenities at police officers while sitting, high on drugs, in a stolen car? Yeah, that just might get you caught...

There are a lot of things that the well-prepared young man needs to make sure of before that big prom date. Ask the girl? Check! Rent the tux? Check! Rent the limo? Check! Do a credit check on the limousine service? Huh? No? Missed that one? Maybe you shouldn't have skipped that little detail... Like the young man says, this will be a story that he can tell his children.

There's no doubt that this was just an honest mistake. I mean, these things happen, right? And spell check isn't going to help much when the wrong word is spelled correctly. I know that I sure found it amusing. I'm also sure that there are some people among the professionally offended who would like nothing more, if they could figure out how to use it to their advantage, then to make much more of this then there really is. (And, don't worry, you aren't going to be finding this recipe in a future The Squirrel Can Cook.)

Scientists have long wondered just exactly what it is that causes earthquakes. Sure, there are fault lines and plate tectonics and such that are being studied, but the exact details of where and when are still elusive. Somebody really should have been asking Iranian cleric Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi, because it seems that he's got it all figured out! Well, it certainly explains a lot about the tectonic activity in Southern California...

And the Nuttiness goes on and on...

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1 comment:

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Oh. My. Word.

The average criminal seems to be a few bricks shy of a load!

Had to laugh at the cause of earthquakes. I'm sure that'll be a real revelation to geologists around the world!