Thursday, November 18, 2010

The Squirrel's Nut Cache - 11/18/2010

The Nut Cache - a collection of recent things I found interesting, or amusing, or nutworthy.

The brand new City Hall building in Chandler, Arizona has opened, and it has a lot of nice, environmentally-friendly features. The lights, for instance, turn on automatically when someone enters the room, and off again when they leave. (Of course, this motion-detector-based system also shuts the lights off when people are working quietly at their desks…) One water-saving feature is that the water that flushes the toilets is the waste water from the building’s air conditioning system. Because the toilet water is “used”, signs were posted instructing people not to drink from the toilets. A sign? Really? Was this a problem with the folks who worked at the old City Hall?

Here’s a real “dumb criminal” story from Jackson, Michigan. It seems a man put on the robes of a Catholic priest, walked into the back room of St. John Catholic Church, and walked out with the money collected in the offering. Silly criminal, he happened to live in the neighborhood, and was recognized by people in the church (who knew he wasn’t their priest!). Yup, arrested…

South Dakota is a tough state. The rugged terrain and harsh weather are enough to toughen up just about anybody. Take Jack, for instance. When faced with a 150-pound mountain lion, Jack didn’t back down, but when on the offensive… and the mountain lion fled up a tree! And one more thing about Jack; Jack is a 17-pound Jack Russell Terrier! Jack’s owner is quoted as saying that Jack “trees cats all the time” and Jack “figured it was just a cat.” (Tell your dogs not to try this at home. We lost our family pet, Nipper, a Shetland sheepdog, to a mountain lion when I was a kid.)

A sore loser’s last act of defiance? Raymond Hamrick, Sheriff of Cleveland County, North Carolina, lost big-time in his re-election bid in the election a few weeks back. In fact, he only got 4% of the vote. Alan Norman, the new Sheriff-elect, was a captain in the Sheriff’s office under Hamrick. In what can only be interpreted as a fit of vindictive spite, Hamrick fired Norman last Friday, as well as three other deputies, who were on the Sheriff-elect's transition team. “The Friday firings sparked a wave of public criticism, with many in Cleveland County decrying Hamrick's decision. But the incident also seemed to cement county residents' support of Norman and his new administration.” Yes. No doubt. The county commissioners quickly re-hired the four men. Alan Norman takes over as Sheriff on December 6.

I have mixed feelings about tattoos. I’ve got friends who have them, and they’re quite popular these days, and I’ve seen some that were very attractive. (And some that weren't...) If you’ve got a tattoo, fine. I don't have any, nor do I desire to ever get one. But I’ve often wondered about guys who get tattooed with their girlfriend’s name; what happens when they break up? Now you’re marked with the name of some girl forever. What do you tell the next girl? Not that I’ve spent a lot of time pondering this quandary, but I’ll admit that I’ve never looked at it from the ex-girlfriend’s point of view; how does she feel about having some bozo she’s not seeing anymore permanently marked with her name? The discomfort such an idea brings is understandable; however, this is not the answer!

I don’t know that this relationship ever got to the “tattoo” stage. It certainly won’t be getting to the altar! When Francisco asked Stacy to marry him, there was not a happy ending. She said, “No.” Well, Francisco, it seems, has a hard time taking “No” for an answer, and tried to run Stacy down with his car. He was arrested later while forlornly walking down the street, still clutching a bouquet of flowers. Two thoughts: First, attempted vehicular homicide pretty much nixes any chance of the couple reconciling. And, second, he probably should have picked a fancy restaurant instead of Burger Stop as a place to “pop the question.”

And the Nuttiness goes on and on...

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