The Nut Cache - a collection of recent things I found interesting, or amusing, or
nutworthy.
I carry an
organ donor card in my wallet, as, I'm sure, do many of you. Once God has determined that I no longer need my heart, longs, corneas, or whatever, I'm more than happy to see them used by someone else, if needed. Many of us know people who's lives have been prolonged by the transplant of donated organs. But now, from Rome, comes this report that Joseph "Benny the Rat" Ratzinger, a long-time vocal proponent of organ donations, is now
too "holy" to have his organs passed to others after his demise. I wonder if the Dalai Lama is an organ donor?
Okay, let's get the silly Romanist superstition out of the way and move on to other odd and funny bits. From Dearborn Heights, Michigan, comes
this tale of the "miraculous" appearance of the figure of a woman seen in a chunk of ice formed from a dripping faucet. As we've discussed before, recognizing the human face or figure in random natural formations, such as melted wax from a candle, ice flows from a leaky faucet, and grilled-cheese sandwiches is called "
Pareidolia." It's not a miracle, it's just what lets you see Dumbo in a cloud as you lay on your back in the grass on a warm summer's day...
Oh, okay, okay... one more on the Romanists... It seems that there is now an
iPhone app for those times when you just can't make it to confession. You're supposed to keep track of your sins on you iPhone, so you can let your priest know about them later. I wonder how many people will mess up the app and end up tweeting their sins or posting their confession as their Facebook status? This could get very amusing...
When robbing a bank, the miscreants, if they are any kind of smart at all, will do something to disguise their identity: hats, glasses, fashionable boots... yes, I said "fashionable boots." Since last July, Federal and State law enforcement people have been trying to capture the elusive "Tootsie Bandit" who robbed banks dressed as a woman. Well, they think
they've finally caught their "man." You'd think a guy dressed as a woman would be easier to catch, but, alas, we are talking California...
From fashionable shod bandits, we now turn to just plain dumb criminals. Listen, when you rob a house, it really isn't a good idea to plug your cell phone in to charge. And it is an even worse idea to actually
leave your plugged-in cell phone behind when you depart with your ill-gotten loot. At least the dumb ones are easy to catch!
From the
Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? department comes a story from Cleveland, Ohio, of a schoolyard beating, an arrest, a trial, and a ticked-off jury. It took the jury less than 30 minutes of deliberation to issue a finding of "Not Guilty" in the trial of 19-year-old Demrick McCloud. Jurors were so annoyed by the total lack of evidence against Mr. McCloud that several of them want to
donate the $100 they were paid for serving on the jury to him. Several are also writing letters to the police and the prosecutors for the shoddy job they did in the investigation. Indeed, 9 of the 12 jurors doubt that the schoolyard assault even took place. It doesn't seem that the police did their job at all. "A policeman's job is only easy in a police state." - Charlton Heston as Mike Vargas in
Touch of Evil, Universal Pictures, 1958. Who will guard the guardians, indeed?
When you take a taxi or hired car to the airport, always make sure you double check the charges. Tony Chan of Hong Kong didn't pay much attention when he paid his driver for the trip to the airport in New York in 2008. But his bank sure noticed! They phoned him to find out if he really paid over
three quarters of a million dollars on a limousine. Of course, he hadn't. No problem with evidence in this case. The driver plead guilty to credit-card fraud this week. So, always check those receipts!
There's been a lot of snow across America this winter. Several big snow storms have made the news. And, from those storms, legends are born. Like David Wells of Chicago, who saw, on video from his home security cameras, of a woman "borrowing" the snow shovel off of his front steps to dig out her car. That would have been fine, except she then walked off... with his shovel. In a fit of pure evil genius, Mr. Wells decided to go
bury her car in snow with his snowblower. Ah, revenge really is a dish best served cold...
Keep those
Nuts and letters coming...
There was a flood.
“Better get in the boat,” the policeman said. “The river is still risin’ fast!”
The pilot yells at the man, “Hang on, we’ll lower a rope to you and pull you up!”
