The Squirrel Did Not Cook This Week...

So, instead, enjoy the Mississippi Squirrel Revival by Ray Stevens:



I'll have food for you next week...

Yes, Squirrel's Are Very Clever!

SquirrelFan Julie from Herding Grasshoppers recently sent me a great video of a squirrel obstacle course:


I had seen this video before, in fact I've posted it before, but it's worth a second look.

And it got me looking. There's lots of squirrel obstacle course videos out there. It seems that making squirrels work for their supper is a common pastime.

This one is from the BBC, and features the cutest of squirrels, the Eurasian Red Squirrel:


And this one is actually a beer commercial!


Yes, clever squirrels, indeed!

The Squirrel's Nut Cache - 5/14/09

The Nut Cache - a collection of recent things I found interesting, or amusing, or nutworthy.

Look, if you want to eat plants, go ahead. If you want to eat only plants, sure, fine, enjoy. But don’t tell me I’m wrong to eat meat (see Genesis 9:3), and don’t act like you’re all “saving the planet,” and everything! Veggie day? Really? Give me a steak!

From the Rodent Revolution watch: Some may see this as a lack of gratitude on the part of the mother squirrel, but, after what I showed you here yesterday, I ask you, can you really blame her? We live in a world of “squirrel-proof” birdfeeders, and “squirrel repellents”, is it surprising that we’d be a bit suspicious? Hm?

OK, this one’s a not funny: Recently, the United States military destroyed Bibles that were printed in the Afghan language that had been sent to Afghanistan, to America Evangelical Christian soldiers, for them to give to Afghanis that they knew. These Bibles were purchased with private funds. I urge you to take the time to read James White’s article on this story.

Somebody needs to buy this guy a teddy bear, or a stuffed rat, or something. Dude, if you’ve got to keep it close, try the top drawer of your nightstand! That “under the pillow” thing is just Hollywood, ok? Don’t sleep with guns!

I understand hobbies. I even get “dangerous” hobbies, like skydiving and bungee-jumping. I don’t plan on ever skydiving or bungee-jumping, but, go ahead, have fun. I’ve enjoyed some whitewater rafting from time to time, but some things are just plain stupid…

That's the Nut Cache for this week!

Torture for Fun and Profit?

There has been a lot of talk about torture recently. Questions have been raised: Is torture ever justified? How far is too far? With the change in administrations, our national policies towards the treatment of prisoners have changed. And the practices of the former administration have come under renewed scrutiny.

In the midst of all of this, it has come to my attention that a New England company is manufacturing and marketing to private citizens a torture device so vile, so diabolical, that it needs to be brought to light.

Warning: the images on these videos are graphically funny and disturbingly amusing.



Did you hear the demented laughter of the torturer! This is not right! These squirrels are not even being questioned. They have no information to disclose. This is torture purely for the amusement of the sick torturer!



This is much, much worse than waterboarding!

I’m calling for congressional hearings into this travesty. All Yankee Flippers and their ilk should be removed from every backyard where they have been placed. This company needs to be shut down, and its executives jailed. Reparations should be paid, in bird seed, to all squirrels, and their families, who have suffered as a result of the illegal and immoral acts of the Droll Yankees Corporation.

Never Underestimate A Squirrel

Mrs Squirrel said to me, "There's no way you could do that obstacle course." -- She's right, of course...

Squirrely Facts

I found some interesting squirrel facts here, and thought I would share them with comments.

Squirrely Facts

• Squirrels are not able to digest cellulose (cell walls in plants) so their diet consists mainly of proteins and carbohydrates including nuts, seeds, fruits, insects, eggs, and even small mammals like birds and frogs.

But sophisticated squirrels prefer Italian, Greek, and Oriental cuisine. And would be glad to co-host Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives with Guy Fieri! (Or just go along to help eat...)

• According to the CDC, squirrels, as well as other small rodents such as rats, mice, chipmunks, and rabbits almost never have rabies and have not been known to transmit the virus to humans in the United States.

So no more cuts about "dirty animals!" You hearin' me? (And rabbits are not rodents! They're Lagomorphs!)

• Squirrels are able to climb down trees because of special joints they have in their ankle that allows their foot to rotate a full 180 degrees. The sharp, curved claws on each of their toes act as spikes that anchor into the tree bark during their descent.

But the claws make it really, really, hard to find good-fitting footwear...

• California ground squirrels chew the molted skin of rattlesnakes and then lick themselves in order to escape their predator. This is a unique behavior since most vertebrates use visual forms of camouflage. The mothers and fathers are immune to snake venom but the squirrel pups are not.

Well, I don't know about my ground-dwelling cousins, but I guess snakes would be an issue. Nice that God equipped them with immunity!

• Using another form of protection against rattlesnakes, squirrels are able to heat up their tails with increased blood flow. Since rattlesnakes have infrared perception in order to sense their prey at night, the snakes are put on the defensive and less likely to attack a squirrel and her pups.

Hi-tech stealth squirrels! Ha, take that, Skunk Works!

• Male White-tailed Antelope Squirrels spar with each other in order to establish a hierarchy in preparation for breeding. They are also the only genus of squirrels that are ground nesters. They get their name from their white underside that matches the patch of fur on the backside of an antelope.

Here's a picture of an Antelope "Squirrel" -- Looks like a chipmunk on Mars, to me. Is that the Viking probe in the background?

• Female red Squirrels living on the Isle Royale, 20 miles off of Thunder Bay, Ontario, mate for only two days out of the year with multiple partners. Afterwards the females separate from the males and will raise the young by herself. These squirrels are also able to predict mast years (years yielding large quantities of nuts) and produce a second litter.

Understand, these are pagan squirrels. Good, Biblical, squirrels would never approve of such behavior!

It's a Squirrel Thing...

Squirrels are very big on etiquette and propriety, as you will soon see.



Of course, squirrels reject the eastern mysticism inherent in the concept of "karma", but do understand that "you reap what you sow" (Galatians 6:7)